how to make a good relationship last
- Make time for romance.
Though “date night” may sound forced, you and your special someone
should aim to have a date night at least once a week, if not more often.
You don’t have to call it “date night” if that sounds too cheesy, but
you should make a goal to spend some quality time together without
anyone else around at least one night a week.
- You can do this same thing during date night, such as cooking dinner
together and then going to the movies, or spice it up and do something
new every time. If you’re staying in, maintain a romantic atmosphere by
lighting some candles and playing some soft music.
- Whatever you do, make sure you have time to really talk during your
special time together. You won’t be able to talk much if you’re just
going to a loud concert together.
- Learn to say no to others during “date night.” Your girlfriends may
be begging you to come out to the bars, but if you’ve scheduled a date
night, tell them you can’t make it and make plans for next week. Things
will break down if “date night” is the thing you’re always willing to
give up.
- You should always look nice, tell each other how much you love each other, and compliment each other throughout the night.
- Make love at least once a week.
You don’t have to plug this into your calendar, and hopefully you won’t
have to, but you should make a conscious effort to make love at least
one a week, no matter how tired you feel after work, or how much you
have going on that week.
- Making love is a way to maintain your intimacy and to grow closer to your partner.
- You should also spend some time just cuddling and kissing each
other, so you don’t feel like you’re just checking “sex” off of your
to-do list.
- Make time to talk.
Though your schedules may get crazy, you need to make a concerted
effort to talk to each other every day, no matter how much work you have
to do. You can set aside time to talk during dinner, or to talk over
the phone if your loved one is away.
- Make a habit of knowing what your loved one’s day was like. Though
you don’t have to bore each other with every little detail of your
lives, you should become comfortable with each other’s routines.
- If you’re spending a week apart, set aside at least fifteen minutes a
day to catch up and to remind your loved one how much you love and miss
him.
- When you do talk, there should be no distractions. You’re not really
talking if you’re also watching the game or checking your phones.
Maintain Strong Communication
- Be honest with each other.
Honesty is the key to any long-lasting relationship. To keep your
relationship strong, you should be able to be open and honest with your
special someone. You should be able to share your most intimate thoughts
and feelings with your loved one, or you’re not really communicating.
- Don’t be afraid to tell your loved one if he disappointed you. Being
honest about your feelings will help you work through the problem, and
is far better than being passive aggressive if you’re upset about
something.
- Share your feelings with your loved one. If you’re really upset
about something that happened at work or something your mother said,
then don’t keep it all inside.
- Know when not to say something. Though honesty is almost
always the best policy, you don’t have to share every little feeling
with your loved one. For example, if you don’t like his new shirt or
think one of his new friends is kind of annoying, you may want to keep
it to yourself.
- Time your honesty. If you want to open up about something important,
make sure you do it when your loved one has time to talk and is
relatively unstressed. Your news will be better received if he has time
to listen.
- Learn to compromise.
In any strong relationship, being happy should be more important than
being right. If you want your relationship to last, then you should
learn how to make decisions with your loved one, and to find a way for
both of you to be happy with the decisions, or to take turns giving in
to each other. Here’s how to do it:
- When you’re making a decision, have your loved one rate how
important it is to him on a scale of 1 to 10, and then state how
important it is to you. Then talk about why it’s so important to both of
you, and what you can do to make it matter less.
- Be thoughtful. When the two of you are making a decision, take the
time to discuss the pros and cons and what you can do to meet halfway.
- Take turns giving in on small decisions. If you picked the restaurant for date night, let your girl pick the movie.
- Make sure both people are compromising. It’s not a compromise if
your girl is always giving in to what you want in the end because you’re
more persistent.
- Learn to say you’re sorry.
This is an important point. If you want to be in a long-lasting
relationship, then you absolutely have to learn how to say you’re sorry
from time to time. When it comes to a relationship, admitting you’re
sorry is much more important than being stubborn.
- Learn to apologize if you’ve done something wrong. It may take you
some time to realize that you made a mistake, but once you do, say that
you’re sorry for what you’ve done.
- Make sure you mean it. Be sincere and make eye contact. It won’t
mean anything if you’re just saying you’re sorry because you have to.
- Learn to accept your loved one’s apology. If he truly means it, then
you should stop sticking to your guns, accept the apology, and move on.
- Tell your loved one how much he means to you.
Don’t ever forget to say “I love you” and take your feelings for
granted. You should tell your loved one that you love him every single
day—multiple times a day, if you can. Remember that there’s a difference
between “love you” and “I love you”—you should really mean it when you
say it.
- Always compliment your loved one. Tell her how great she looks in her new dress or how much you love her smile.
- Always thank your loved one. Don’t take her favors and kind actions for granted.
- Always tell your loved one how special he is. Don’t ever forget to make him feel unique.
Keep Moving Forward
- Find new interests to pursue together.
A relationship is like a shark—if it doesn’t move forward, it dies. You
should find ways of keeping your relationship fresh so your love
doesn’t become just a part of your routine. One way of doing this is to
find new interests that you can pursue together, so you have something
to be excited about as well as a shared passion.
- Take a weekly dance class together. This will give you some great exercise and will increase your passion for each other.
- Find a new hobby together. Try taking a painting or ceramics class, or find a new love for sailing.
- Take a class together. Try learning a new language or taking a history class together.
- Train for a race together. This is a great way to get closer, whether you’re training for a 5K or a marathon.
- Do anything out of your comfort zones. Try hiking, mountain biking,
or even ice skating. Doing something completely unfamiliar will bring
you closer together.
- Keep it fresh in the bedroom.
If you want to maintain a healthy relationship, then you have to
maintain a healthy sex life. Though your lovemaking may not be what it
was in the beginning after five years together, you should still try new
things in the bedroom so you’re still excited about making love with
your partner and that everything you do still feels like an adventure.
- Make love in new positions. Don’t do the same old thing you’ve been
doing, even if it works. You can even look up new positions together,
which will be great for foreplay.
- Make love in new places. Don’t always go for the bedroom—try the
couch, the kitchen table, or even check in to a hotel in the middle of
the day.
- Try going to a sex store to pick up some kinky items to bring into bed.
- Take trip to a new place together.
Though a vacation isn’t a good long-term solution to any relationship
problems, taking a trip together can help take you out of your same old
perspective and appreciate your love in a new way. Plus, planning a trip
together will give you something new to look forward to.
- Plan the trip you’ve always wanted to take. If you’ve both been
talking about going to Paris together for the last seven years and you
have the funds for it, it’s time to make your dreams a reality.
- Take a short day trip. Even driving an hour out to spend a day in
the woods or the beach can make your relationship feel fresher.
- Take a second honeymoon. If you’re already married and had a honeymoon, take another honeymoon to commemorate your love.
No comments:
Post a Comment